Change starts from within

Kyler Vernon, writer ; Photographer

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People all over the world idolize and reference the works of brilliant entrepreneurs, leaders, and celebrities. On that token, same those people can’t find to catch a break in their own lives unlike their fortune studded idols. The “woe is me” culture is upon us, and it is taking serious tolls on our society. Self-victimization is not only distracting people from what’s true in life, but it also is derailing the many brilliant young minds of today.

Why is that? It happens when you start to view themselves as the constant with no errors. Yet the truth is other people aren’t the problem. You’re the problem. You can’t change other people, but you can change yourself. But it’s difficult. It’s much easier and much more gratifying to blame someone else for your misery.

Consider a young low income activist, making a “statement” against the “corrupt” capitalist economic system through unruly protest. What has that activist done, other than bring more anger to the people around him who have nothing to do with his real problems?

The guilt, doubt and shame the activist will inevitably feel will have to be suppressed so his beliefs can remain unchanged. More outlash will occur, yet he likely will do nothing in order to change the his economic circumstance.

In the play “The Cocktail Party” by American-British poet T.S. Eliot, one of the characters is having a very hard time. She speaks of her profound unhappiness to her psychiatrist. She tells him that she hopes her suffering is all her own fault.

Taken aback, the psychiatrist asks why. Because, she tells him, if it’s her fault, she can do something about it. If it’s in the nature of the world, however, she’s doomed. She can’t change everything else, but she could change herself. Now, there are people who seem to be consigned to a terrible fate. But most of us aren’t. Most of us have a chance to make our lives better. But how?

Start small. Ask yourself a few questions: Have you taken full advantage of the opportunities offered to you? Are you working to your fullest capacity at school or at work? Have you, in other words, set your own house in order?

If the answer is no, try this: stop doing what you know to be wrong. Stop today.
Don’t waste time asking how you know that what you’re doing is wrong.

Start paying attention: Do you procrastinate? Show up late? Spend money you don’t have?

Get to work on time. Stop interrupting people. Make peace with your siblings and your parents. Diligently utilize everything you already have at hand.

If you do those things, your life will improve. You’ll become more peaceful, productive and desirable.

You’ll stop getting in your own way. Instead of bringing trouble to yourself, your family, and your society, you’ll be a positive and reliable force. Your life may still be difficult, yet that’s the price of being alive. But maybe you’ll become strong enough to accept that burden, and in that fashion, even come to act nobly, and with purpose.